


Love Love Love

by ohmsem



Category: The Folk of the Air - Holly Black
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Regret, Short & Sweet, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, but I wanted them to have this conversation, jude's crying, so many feelings, this is so cheesy, unable to express
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:47:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24253840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohmsem/pseuds/ohmsem
Summary: "You love love love, when you know I can't love you"Jude thinks that Cardan made a mistake in marrying her, but he tries to show her why she's wrong.
Relationships: Jude Duarte/Cardan Greenbriar
Comments: 2
Kudos: 123





	Love Love Love

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! This fic is based on "Love love love" by Of Monsters and Men. Feel free to listen to it if you want the vibes.

I knew that I had to go back inside eventually, but at the pond behind the castle I could pretend the party inside wasn't happening. When I looked into the reflection, however, I still saw myself for what I was. A liar, overly stubborn, impossible to compromise with, and High Queen of Elfhame. 

I was sitting on my knees with little regard for the marks the damp dirt would leave on my dress. Instead, my fingers dug into my jaw where I held my head is it stared down into the glassy dark water. I had been gone for a while, but by the continued sounds of revelry in the distance I realized I probably hadn't been missed. A pressure built in my chest and throat at the thought, warmth building in my cheeks. My eyes began to dampen with tears I tried desperately to hold back when I heard footsteps behind me, muffled by the grass. I turned, but nearly collapsed into my knees when I saw Cardan walking up to me. At the sight of him, tears began to spill freely and fully until I was sobbing on the ground. 

Cardan rushed the rest of the way to where I was and sat next to me, picking up my torso to hold me up in his arms. I was still crying, though a desperate remaining part of me tried to think of an excuse as to why. I didn't want to tell him about my insecurities, about what I think we should do while he was stroking my hair and kissing the crown of my head.

"Jude, what's wrong?" Cardan asked softly once my sobs had quieted. Against him, I tucked in my nose and began crying softly once more, as if everything inside of me was being released for the first time in weeks. 

After my cheeks began to dry, I sat up and faced him, trying to appear as resolute as possible. "What's wrong?" he asked again, stroking a thumb over my hand where he held it between us. 

"Is it possible for faerie weddings to be disbanded?" I said, not making eye contact. I felt his hand go limp in my own before he responded. 

"No, but if both parties regret their decision they can...unofficially end their relationship and take consorts." 

I nodded, swallowing the dry lump in my throat that had begun to form at the realization of how hurt this would make him. 

"Okay," I said, nodding to myself and swallowing again. "I think we need to end our relationship." This time I looked up, just in time to see the hurt flash in Cardan's eyes. 

"Why?" he asked, the smoothness of his tone doing a poor job of hiding the quiver in it. "Have I done something?"

This question made me start crying again, shaking my head and crawling into his lap as I did so. "No, Cardan. You've been good. You've been too good," I tried to explain. I heard him start to ask another question, but I kept speaking before he could. "I just think we made a mistake in getting married. Not because of you."

"Then what was the mistake?" he asked. He was holding me more hesitantly this time, and I felt the unsure hover of his hands over my waist and hip. 

I sniffled and took a shaky breath. "I don't know how to love you the way you love me. I don't know how to say it back, I don't know how to show it, I don't know how to discuss it. I don't know how, and I feel terrible about it all the time. I can't keep feeling this way, and I keep doing this to you. You deserve someone who knows how to love." I tucked my forehead under his jaw, closing my eyes against the world around me. Everything inside me was swirling, and I was trying desperately to control it. I wasn't a feelings person, but now that my fears had come loose everything else had followed. 

"You're not doing anything to me, Jude. I know you love me, even if it's not the same as I do," he said gently, rubbing a head down my spine. I shook my head. "You don't say it or show it the way I do, but you love me and I can tell. Is that what you're worried about?" 

I sniffled again and nodded against his neck, hoping he could feel the difference. 

"Every time you meet my eyes across a crowded room, I feel your love. Every time you laugh at something stupid I've done, I feel your love. Every time you take away my goblet because I've had too much to drink--even if I glare at you--I feel your love. You're not sappy, Jude. You're not affectionate. You're not emotional. But I don't expect you to be. I love you as you are." I hushed against him, lost in his gentle rocking and rubbing of my back. "Tell me, Jude. Do you love me? The best you can?"

I nodded. 

"That's all I ask of you." 


End file.
